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The Importance of a Good Reputation by Asher Rauzman ('21)

2020/5781

In this week's Parashah, we learn about the interaction between Yaakov and Shechem. We learn about Dinah, the daughter of Leah, how she is taken by Shechem, and how the brothers respond by offering to allow the intermarriage of their two nations, provided that the citizens of Shechem receive circumcisions. While they do this, the Torah wastes no time, saying that on the third day of their recovery, Shimon and Levi attack the town and kill every male. After returning home, Yaakov Avinu rebukes them: “VaYomer Yaakov El Shimon Ve’El Levi Achartem Oti LeHaVeEesheni BeYosheiv HaAretz BeKena’ani UBaPerizi VeAni Mitei Mispar VeNe’esphu Alai VeHikuni VeNishmaditi Ani U’Beiti,” “Jacob said to Shimon and Levi, ‘You have brought trouble on me, making me odious among the inhabitants of the land, the Cana’anites and the Perizzites; my men are few in number so that if they unite against me and attack me, I and my house will be destroyed”(Genesis 34:30). In theory, this rebuke makes sense, but how can Yaakov stand by and worry about the impending danger that his family is in when a mere two people have just decimated an entire city? Surely, eleven people of the same stature will have no problem defeating as many armies as they need to (provided they still have Hashem's help).

While there is room to argue the concept of “not relying on miracles”, Seforno rewrites the assumption of the Pasuk and offers an answer that applies to all of us today. He writes that Yaakov was not  scared of being killed by the other nations, he was scared of what they would say. Evidently, Yaakov did not mind the killing of the people in Shechem, nor did he mind the deal proposed, circumcising all of the men. “But you cannot go back on your word” was what Yaakov was trying to say. If the other nations talk amongst themselves, they will hear what has been done, and think that we are dishonest people. Yaakov was not worried about the prospect of war between his family and other nations, he was worried about his reputation.

Seforno writes that Yaakov Avinu understood what was really at stake. If Shimon and Levi go back on their promises, it reflects poorly on them, their family, and Jews as a whole, however small they were at that point. It takes one back to almost any school or camp trip, where, before leaving the bus, we would hear about how important it was for us to be respectful. While I applaud anyone who took that message to heart or even listened to it for that matter, I (regretfully) rolled my eyes and kept on talking to my friends. But this is what Ya’akov Avinu is telling us. Shimon and Levi might have only seen the present, and let their anger get the best of them, but Ya’akov saw the future in store.

This message is echoed in Pirkei Avot: “Rabi Shimon Omer: Sheloshah Ketarim Heim: Keter Torah, VeKeter Kehunah, VeKeter Malchut; VeKeter Sheim Tov Oleh Al GabeiHen,” “Rabi Shimon said: There are three crowns: The crown of Torah, The crown of priesthood, and the crown of kingship; but the crown of a good name surpasses them all.” (Pirkei Avot 4:17). We learn from this that whatever one can accomplish, it is not greater than the most difficult task: creating a positive reputation for oneself.

However, one cannot help but notice that in both of these texts, there is no explicit direction as to how to  achieve this tremendous feat. Granted, it may be a bit extensive to summarize how to create a solid reputation in a minimalist document, such as the Torah, but why couldn't the Torah have shared some ideas in a few concise words? Perhaps we can uncover another crucial message that Ya’akov Avinu is laying down. Reputations are not about finding the way. By definition, each person has a different way of achieving their specific positive reputation. 

This is also mirrored in this week's Parashah. Right after Ya’akov's reprimand, Shimon and Levi respond with a challenge: “VaYomeru HaChaZonah Ya'Aseh Achoteinu” - “And they responded: ‘Shall we allow our sister to be treated like a prostitute?” (BeReishit. 34:31). Why does the Torah add unnecessary words such as “Achei Dinah,” “Brothers of Dinah,” and “Betach,” “Confident” (BeReishit 34:25)? We know that these were Dinah's brothers, and do not need a description of Shimon and Levi's emotions when they were preparing to destroy a city. What is going on here?

Perhaps we can see this situation through the eyes of Shimon and Levi. Here were two brothers who knew that family is the highest priority. They understood that in order for them to be content with their reputation, they had to make it abundantly clear that they put family first no matter what. The Torah then concludes the Perek after Shimon and Levi`s disagreement with Ya’akov. This is to illustrate the obvious contrast of opinion and to spell out an obvious lesson to us: Do we take Ya’akov Avinu`s side and say that we can't be dishonest under any circumstances, or do we take the side of Shimon and Levi and say that dishonesty is somewhat irrelevant, as long as there is a strong family unit? 

Going forward, we must realize the importance of crafting an image and reputation for ourselves. We must understand that there is a bigger picture than just a few actions or decisions. This is the message that Ya’akov Avinu wants us to focus on. Are we going to choose to live a mediocre life, with disregard for our surroundings, or are we going to pursue a life that is productive, and reflects well on us, our families, and all of Klal Yisrael?